Friday, November 13, 2009

A Shit Ton of Stuff Going On.

Oh man, I totally meant to write about my weekend. It was pretty awesome, except for one major tragedy that WE MUST NEVER SPEAK OF. Other than that tiny minor CATASTROPHE THAT YOU WILL NEVER MENTION TO ME, I did many blissful things:
  • I went out for a meal with some beloved ladies. An Italian meal. With portions large enough to feed whole family. Glorious.
  • I went to the mall, and finally threw caution to the wind and bought a damn bag already. It is Michael Kors. It is gunmetal. It is bad-ass. And then, having bought one bag, I wandered into the Kate Spade store and marveled that I really, really needed another bag. For work. I am a professional.
  • No, I didn't buy it. Yet.
  • I went to Neiman Marcus, for the first time in my life. Oh, and likely the last. I can afford Michael Kors; I can't afford you, Oscar de la Renta. But a gal can dream.
  • I wandered into the children's department, and picked up the most darling Christmas dress and thought, wow, wouldn't this be nice for a darling baby girl? And then I looked at the price tag and choked on my own saliva. $240? For a tiny baby gown? Ha. Don't babies puke all the time? Unless my future child gets invited to the Oscars, I shall never again venture into the children's department at Neiman Marcus.
  • I went to Sephora. Oh hell YES I did. I did it up right, and I felt like a trillion dollars walking out of there. I love you, Sephora! But only twice a year.
  • I went to the book store. And I sat in the coffee shop. Reading books. Honestly, does life get better than that?
  • I ordered a pizza.
  • I ate cold pizza for breakfast.
  • I watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, and I LOVED it. I totally get why people hate it, by the way. But to me, the whole story was magical. And you know, I was in an emotional place. And plus, Brad Pitt is really hot. Even when he is like 60 or so. So there you go. (That was an amazing review, by the by. So incisive.)
  • J and I saw The Swell Season in concert on Sunday night. It was one of the most incredible live performances evah. Glan Hansard is a true gentleman; ebullient and so damn grateful to have people sitting in the audience listening to his band play. There were even many, many sing-alongs! If you ever get the chance to see SS, by all means, run.
  • I announced to the Internet that I was pregnant.
  • Wait, no, I meant to do that, but I was all weepy from Benjamin Button and the GREAT TRAGEDY that no one must ever ask me about.
  • But yeah, like Tiffani Thiessen, I've got a shit ton of stuff going on. And, er, most of that stuff has to do with gestating a human.
  • And trying to stay sane.
  • And not crying all the time at everything.
  • And not sleeping 12 hours a night.
  • And actually living life despite a grueling first trimester.

So that's it! Your blog-mistress is not just a lazy whore; nay, she is a pregnant person, though still vaguely lazy and whorish, I suppose.

Ninja - as s/he shall henceforth be known - is due in late May. I am 12 weeks and 5 days today, which either means I am done with my first trimester, or I have one more week of my first trimester, depending on which pregnancy book you are reading.

Also? S/he is a rock star. But more on that later.


Koos said...

Oh my God, Congrats! A Michael Kors bag, so exciting!
Hooray for announcing Ninja's arrival, you and J are going to be awesome parents and I'm super happy for you, which I think I have stated eleventy billion times by now. And you are going to be a super adorable pregnant lady.
It won't be long now, before we will both have screaming kids while we are trying to talk on the phone.

Homevalley said...

I think both Ninja and the MK are both excellent reasons to celebrate. And thank you, Koos!

Anonymous said...

My wife is a whore? So that means I have more problems than just dealing with the pregnancy hormones? Ey yi yi.


Homevalley said...

Tune in next week, H, where I discuss the issue of Ninja's paternity! Who will it be??

Anonymous said...

CONGRATULATIONS Melissa! I am so happy for you two. Hope to see you soon in all your pregnant glory!

-Mr. Patterson

Anonymous said...

Come on - whats the tragedy?!? I am dying to know!

If your baby can do jazz hands half as good as you, s/he will definately be a rock star.

Pubert? I like it. its filthy.


Homevalley said...

Allie: No. We can't ever go there.

Thanks, Mr. P!

Annie said...

yay for you. I'm trying to work my way up to an actual Dooney & Bourke.

Oh and also the preggers thing.

Hmm gun metal.