Still sober!
It’s been five days, and I haven’t had a sip of alcohol. Not even when old friend Nikki came for a sleepover on Wednesday night, fresh from an awful break-up. I offered the requisite glass of wine as soon as she walked through the door, but she declined, saying matter-of-factly that she didn’t want to self-medicate.
(And well, yeah. She’s awe-inspiring. She’s so damn strong and beautiful and hopeful through the hell she’s going through, and she has the presence of mind to turn down mugs full of sparkly weird pink cider. She’s going to be just fine, that one.)
Nor did I falter when I arrived at J’s parent’s house for dinner last night, after logging time in the dreaded Port Authority Bus Terminal. I’d made the two-hour trek from the city to Hellertown, PA, and reluctantly stopped J’s Dad mid-pour.
“Not tonight,” I say mildly.
Mr. J stares quizzically, clearly baffled at this strange turn of events (The man once commented, “Wow, you sure can drink for such a small girl!”)
J, in an astounding and loving declaration of solidarity, adds, “Yeah, we’re not drinking tonight.”
Mr. and Mrs. J look on, confused.
“Well, I had this bad experience last weekend, and I decided to see if I could stop drinking any alcohol for a month,” I explain. (That’s the ticket, HomeValley, tell your boyfriend’s parents about Vomit Fest ‘06. And also, can I call you Mom and Dad?)
“Well,” Mrs. J says, “How about you just don’t drink so much?”
Right.
But really, Internet, how long can my sobriety last, when J made next weekend plans with the Real JC? When the three of us get together in Manhattan, there is a certain formula by which we operate:
Funny-Smelling Dive + Juke Box + $7 Pitchers + No Toilet Paper in Bathroom for HomeValley + Late Night Snack Food in Close Vicinity = Blissfully Happy Drunken Trio
Who am I to disrupt an equation that has proved successful time and time again?
2 comments:
Orlandos!!!!!!
There are two events next weekend....
Friday: smelly dive (which you are allowed to invite any hot chicks who just broke up with their boyriends)
Sunday: Eagles Bar (their beer is made with real bits of panther, so you know its good)
Both require consumption of nectar.
Post a Comment